Sacred Monster (noun): Someone who loomed very large in your life at a formative stage of young adulthood (15-30), changing your sense of self to the core.

Most of us have a Sacred Monster. An ex-partner, an old boss, a tricky friend. That person we cannot seem to dislodge from our psychological landscape (or dreamscape). You may have pre-scripted emotional responses to certain situations because of the hold this Sacred Monster has over you, even if you’ve outwardly ‘moved on’. Years after that relationship ended, we deify our monsters, sometimes sabotaging new relationships, seeing others (and ourselves) through our monster’s lens.

Via her clients’ moving recollections and stories, psychotherapist Charlotte Fox Weber opens a new conversation about how and why we cling to these figures who appalled and enthralled us. Beneath the surface of our biggest choices about how we live, she asks: how do our Sacred Monsters confound us? And what might it mean to be free of them?

With this new framework for self-understanding, we can recognise and better name these lingering figures in our past who unconsciously shape our present. In doing so, we might understand ourselves better, more humanely, allowing ourselves to lead truly fulfilling, exciting lives.