A Teen's Guide to Modern Manners

There''s little that''s been written yet

Concerning teenage etiquette,

So as a sort of useful guide

Some gruesome cases lie inside

Of teenagers who lost their way

And ultimately had to pay.

You''ll read about the tragic fate

Of Pete, who couldn''t get a date,

And Jen, whose hopes and dreams were quashed,

And James, who staunchly never washed.

This book could be, and no mistake,

The best investment that you make,

So quickly - pluck it from the shelf!

Or suffer some such fate yourself...