Matty May was conceived during a drunken one-night stand on his Nan’s settee in July 1988. Since then, he has tried to end his life three times.

An uncensored and funny show about rage, suicide and so-called self-care, If You Love Me This Might Hurt explores mental health, council estates, the trauma men can inflict and the magic of having a brilliant nan all through a queer lens.

Some conversations will always be uncomfortable. Society wants change for our mental health care system, but the system doesn’t want to make the necessary changes within society that will allow us to take these needed steps forward. In this show, Matty dismantles the roots of the problem that would actually enable everyone to put their mental health first.

**Trigger Warning** This piece discusses suicide and suicidal ideation, and some people might find it disturbing.