'I've turned boys into men and policemen into coppers,' said the Sergeant. 'Policemen have got brains, but coppers, they've got brains and common sense.'

No two days were ever the same for bobby-on-the-beat Martyn Johnson. Come rain or come shine, he patrolled his patch with a sharp eye for troublemakers and a kind word for those in need of a friend. Whether he was pursuing unlikely coal thieves, tracking down peacocks gone AWOL or investigating mysterious flying saucers over Sheffield, PC Johnson faced every new challenge with a smile and a healthy dose of his copper's common sense.

In his charming and funny memoir, Martyn Johnson recalls the rogues, cheats and scoundrels - as well as the many friends - who made his life on the beat so unforgettable.